This One's For the Girls

I've procrastinated with this post for far too long, but enough is enough, people. Bear with me while I weed through years of brain cobwebs to get to my point.

For the past few weeks, I have been overwhelmed with the amount of conversations I've had with my girlfriends about their body image and the general dislike that they/we feel about our bodies and our appearances. Btw, things could get very Eat, Pray, Love here, so I ask that you again, bear with me. For example: Before going out to the bars one night, about 4 other girls and I were standing in the bathroom finishing getting ready. Hair pins were flying, makeup was being slapped on and drinks were being spilled. At some point, the conversation turned to talking about things we didn't like about ourselves. Before I knew it, I had joined in on a chorus of self-deprecation

"My arms are too big"
"My ass is too flat"
"My hair is so shitty"
"I can't do makeup, I look like an idiot"
"I feel huge"
"I weighed myself yesterday and cried"
"You have perfect boobs, I'm so jealous"

Getting ready for a night on the town is somewhat of a ritual for girls. We take this time very seriously and it is prime for bonding. Similarly, it seems as though we look for friendship, loyalty, and reassurance in other girls by disclosing what we hate about ourselves.

After my tear-filled night crying about how imperfect I am (referenced here) I woke up ready to make a change, but I was also so frustrated that I couldn't come to the root of the issue. Was it just the media that makes my peers and I feel inadequate? Or are we to blame? Have we created a society that reflects how we feel about ourselves? No matter how many Dove Real Beauty ads I see, when given the option, I would still choose the skinnier model over the "real-sized" women. No matter how many times my friends reassure me about my face, my body, or my hair, I can still pin-point every little inch of myself that I want to change. We all can. How many times have we looked to our peers, our mothers, boyfriends, teachers, or sisters for validation? Why does it seem impossible for us to be able to look in the mirror and tell ourselves that we are enough? 

I'm still trying to figure this all out, but the best I can do right now is try and make the change for myself personally, but also hold my friends accountable for the way we talk about ourselves and each other. No more pity parties.

I've thrown together a little body image/self-validation playlist - total chick music, sorry to any guys who are reading...
 
When you're feeling like crap and want to feel sad about it listen to this: 


When you're feeling like crap and want to feel as fabulous as a drag queen on Open Mic Night, listen to this and rally UP:



When you feel like your butt is too big: 



To work on your self-validation, follow in Alanis' footsteps (you may want to grab a floor pillow for this one): 



Now go and write 5 things you love about yourself and your body. DO IT.

Thanks for reading!